Today my son Tucker turns 10! Now yes I know I posted yesterday that Seri was turning 3…that’s because I had my two children one day apart. I know, I should have planned that better! /laugh
Tucker was my first baby. I say baby because I was already having Samantha on weekends so in a way I felt like I was already a part time parent, but to a toddler. I remember when I found out I was pregnant. I had gone to get my nails done, and Ben called me to say that the doctor’s office had called him and said the test was positive. I was so happy I bolted into the bathroom and got hysterical. My nail woman, who knew the situation, started jumping up and down and pounding on the door asking if it was a positive. I love telling people that I found out I was pregnant after my ex did!
I had been through several of my friends and my brother having children and seen parenting things I liked and didn’t like from all sides. Ben and I had a great deal of trouble conceiving Tucker, so most of the people we knew and hung out with already had one or two children by the time I got pregnant.
I had spent a great deal of time just watching new parents, and I had come to the conclusion that most parents suffer from something I term New Parent Dementia. In all my childless wisdom I assumed that having seen so many parents go through this I could avoid it. HA! Let me describe some common forms of this illness.
Germ mania: everything and everyone is dirty, and no one is allowed to approach the little darling without a level 5 hazmat suit and a full surgical scrub! Health certificates are required certifying no illnesses in the last 6 weeks and all vaccinations are up to date.
Food mania: the little darling can only eat organic, pure, free range, vegan foods picked by free trade nubile naked native women.
Schedule mania: the tiny baby can only eat, sleep, poop, and play at designated times
Chart number one with each tiny poo loveingly recorded. And make no mistake, there is a lot of love (and insanity) in these charts.
Sleep mania: the infant can only sleep on the mama, or only off the mama…I’ve seen it both ways.
Recording mania: every coo the little darling makes and every poo it puts out must be recorded for posterity.
Chart number two with each nursing recorded with notes. I love one of the lower entries (all written by Ben) written when sleep deprivation was really taking hold...it says Oops he crapped his pants! A reference to one of my favorite S&L sketches.
Facebook mania: I’ve seen babies with pages and pictures and posts before they are even born!
Naked mania: being absolutely convinced that the baby doesn’t have enough clothing, even though he has so many outfits he can’t possibly wear them all even once before they are outgrown
Vision mania: Tucker was born after 46 hours of hard labor. He had a cone head, black eyes, and his face was kind of squished. I thought he was the most gorgeous thing I had ever seen. Looking back now I think he looked like he'd gone 10 rounds with Rocky Balboa! /laugh I don't think most parents get over this one, I still think all my children are the most beautiful in the world.
Tucker looking a little worse for wear.
My little angel a few days later. Isn't he the most precious thing you've ever seen?
I personally suffered from schedule, naked, vision and recording mania. Ben and I had Tucker on a strict schedule. He had wake time, food time, play time (before he could move we would set him up with bright objects to “stimulate him”, and cuddle time. At the time I thought this was perfectly normal behavior, for real! /laugh
One of our wake time activities, meant to stimulate the baby. Tucker didn't appear too stimulated! My parents (we lived with them at this time) must have thought we were nuts.
Seriously I think this is something every first time parent and some second time parents go through. Samantha (my oldest) commented to me a few weeks ago that her being the oldest was really unfair. As she sees things the oldest is the one who gets “experimented on” and then the younger kids get the benefit of our learning from our mistakes with her. I suspect she has a good point!
One of my favorite pictures of my infant son. Ben and I did an entire series of Tucker with various musical instruments.
I can’t believe it’s been 10 years since I had my tiny son. So far he (and the other three) have survived all the things we have tried and all the experiments we have performed. And someday maybe he will have children of his own, and then he will understand how much I love him. I believe children are gifts loaned to us by Deity for the short time we are on this earth. I don’t know what I did to deserve such a wonderful little son, but I’m so glad he is with me!
Tucker playing with his baby sister. He is an awesome big brother!
My beautiful blue-eyed (and haired!) boy.
